Dear you.

Dear you,

Your nice.
Your sweet.
But very akward.
It's fun.
I like you.

Sincerely,
Me.

We are free.

When I met you, didn't know what to do.
Baby, you just couldn't relate to me.
I said you could leave if you wanted out,
but baby, you stuck around. <3

   Great weekend. The sun was out the entire time. Went down to Matheson Lake and was besotted by the view that awaited me. The lake was beautiful, so still that you could see the surroundings reflecting off it's surface. Sat there for hours, with my journal and my camera... Capturing it all. It was all lovely until Nathan ruined it by jumping off the rope swing. Silly schmuck. He nearly got hypothermic.. Serves him right! Overall, it was a wonderful weekend :)

  Being at the lake got me thinking about how lucky I truely am. I have a family that loves and supports me no matter what happens. I have amazing friends, who understand what im going through, how hard I am going after my goals. They stick by me, no matter how busy it gets. I live in a beautiful country and in a community where I can be who I want to be. The fact that I can be myself without being judge is a blessing in it's self. The only thing missing from my wonderful life is my Nan. I wish I could see her everyday. I wish I could see her and hug her, instead of just talking through the phone. She means the world to her, she believes in my dreams as much as I do. As far as she is concerned, I can achieve anything in life. I know she reads this, so Nan Mary, you are the most amazing person ive ever met. I love you so much and thank you for holding on for me.

 Tonight before you go to bed, I dare you to think of all the great things you have in your life. Whether it be friends, family or just being able to get away without doing your homework, be greatful. We are the lucky ones.


QOTB: Never mind searching for who you are. Search for the person you aspire to be.

P.s attached is a picture I took this weekend :)

So it goes something like this...

Kay.
Since I like this keyboard and I am in the most serious stages of procrasination, I'm just gunna write about anything and everything that comes to mind. So warning to the ADD people out there, this entry is not for you.

   FIRSTLY: Cliques.
I hate the fact that you wont hang out with me because I'm a "Nerd." It's not like I can't speak your language, it's not like I have webbed fingers and a green face, I'm just smart. I don't judge you for being in love with sports. I don't judge you for how you look, how you act or who your friends are, so why do you judge me? I don't believe we should be categorized into groups like: sluts, jocks, punks, skaters, nerds, popular kids. Why can't we all just be ourselves? The sad fact is that I hear people calling me "Nerd" or "Geek" more than I hear people call me by my real name everyday at school. I don't refer to you as "That stupid kid with the tight clothing and the lopsidded hair", so please don't refer to me as a Nerd.

SECONDLY: Relationships.
They bug me. I don't understand them anymore. They are great when your in one, but as soon as the relationship demolishes, your all like "and the point of that was...?" Why can't we just date. So that when the person gets on our nerves or boring, we can't just screen their calls. No more messy breakups, no more broken hearts, just move on with your life and find the next skipper that appeals to you.

THIRDLY: THE FREEGEN OLYMPICS.
Well it's ovious I don't like them. I don't see the point to them. Well that's not true, I like the way they bring countries from all over the world together... BUT THEY DO IT SO THEY CAN COMPETE. But seriously, when I look at all the money they spent on the olympics to make it look all fancy, it breaks my heart. All the money they spent on this years olympics alone could have been enough to HELP EVERY SINGLE FRICKEN PERSON IN HAITI. Enough to make them all have a roof over their heads and food in their bellies. GRR.

Alive.

K, well this is it.
   Tonight at midnight, UWC's doors close to applicants. If you application isn't in, your screwed. A part of me wishes that some people will have missed the dealine, but another part of me hopes that everyone who wanted to gets their application in. Now, we wait. We wait until they contact us. Telling us whether we got an interview or if we weren't even considered for one. Then, we go to the interview, do our lil bit, take part in a workshop or two and then we wait some more. We wont really know until May if were in or not. The suspense is going to kill me but the weight is lifted now. I can now relax. Focus on rebuilding my friendships that fell through the cracks, working on my personal hobbies like photography and do a lot more volunteering.

   *sighs* Im really worried. One of my buds A... She's going through a lot at the moment. I want to help her, let her know that im here for her.... But I don't know how. I know the cuts still fresh for her and I know I should give her some space... But im worried about her..
If you read this girlie... Know that I love you. All your friends here love you... If you don't want to be there anymore, come back home to us and we'll take care of you.




  I can't wait to get outa here. I feel as if it's too late for me to build new friendships or create new ones here. I feel as if this part of my life is done. Specially now that your not even talking to me... I need to get outa here. I need to be around people who think like I do and act like I do. Im going to Kenya now just so I can get out of here. I feel as if im in a room that is getting smaller and smaller....

I CAN'T BREATHE.

QOTB: Heaven is not a place that you go  when you die, it's the moment in life when you actually feel alive.

Pumas, Penguins and Bigfoot.

Theres no denying it.
It's hard.
My feelings,
and my emotions,
are unclear.

It's just been one of those days. Everytime someone has asked me what the heck is wrong, I just want to jab them with my "I <3 starwars" pin. It's frustrating, its annoying, it doesn't make me feel any better! Stress is piling up at alarming rates. People think it's so cool that im gradding early and that I'm doing all these things in my time, but they do NOT understand how hard it is to balance all of it. It's all bubbling up, I can feel it fit to burst...

BUT.
I will not surrender. I was made for challenges like this. What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger. I will come out of this a better and stronger person. I will NEVER give up :)

QOTB: The future depends on what we do in the present.

Hello World.

Fresh start.
New chance.
Not to mess up,
but to do it right.
It'll all be over,
within in 5months.
Then, the real adventure starts.

WELL HELLO SEMESTER 2!
GOODBYE UWC APPLICATION.
HELLO HAITI FUNDRAISING.
GOODBYE SHYA.
HELLO PRESENTATION IN TWO WEEKS.
GOODBYE SANITY.
HELLO $12,000 I NEED TO RAISE FOR KENYA.


Oh, and hello to you too. :)

As you can tell, lifes been a lil all over the place for me. Not much to say other than that. I've got 5months left of highschool, before I pack my bags and HEAD ON OUTA HERE.


Goodbye Victoria.
Goodbye Canada.
Hello World.

QOTB: Courage is fear that has said it's prayers.